Safari!

A year ago today I was on a safari.

When I close my eyes I still can see the giraffes graceful walk and the harte beasts leaping across the road and the elephants lumbering oh so spritely. I see the warthogs jumping around and water buffalo wallowing. I can see the hippo that we saw out of the water running.

I am so blessed to have seen all of those amazing things that God has made. It was a good birthday and today has been great too! Thanks for all of my birthday wishes friends!

I'm a Bad Blogger

Jonathan, just before Mitchell and I left in April, came to Acacia Tree on March 19, Mitchell's birthday
Norah came to Acacia Tree in mid February after I brought her back from an island on Lake Victoria tied to me. She doubled weight and began to smile this amazing smile!
In the time that I haven't blogged I missed talking about things that happened one year ago. I met Norah, met Jonathan, and today (one year ago) I was packing to go to a safari in Murchison Falls Uganda.

I haven't blogged so I am very bad. Norah is now safe and fat and back with her family. Jonathan seems to be getting healthy and hopefully will find a family soon.

I've been reading over my past journal entries to somewhat keep me distracted. Mitch and I continue trying to start a family and I keep peeing on sticks and they keep saying no and I keep having tests done. It all kind of sucks but there is not much I can do.

I've been just praying and waiting and that's all I can do I suppose.

On my birthday this Thursday I have a blood test. Please keep me in your prayers because all this infertility stuff sucks!

The day I met baby Theo

Sunday January 24, 2010

Robin just returned with a new baby. He is one and a half years old and weighs just 6.9 kg. He was living with his grandmother and doesn't have a name.

God I just don't understand. Lord please five this baby strength and be with him tonight as he sleeps in a new place. Give him peace and security. Let him know that he will be okay.

The idea of little Theo, named the next day meaning "Gift from God", not having a name broke my heart. His healing process at Acacia Tree took a long time. He distrusted many people especially white men. He took a long time to warm up to Mitchell. He was terrified of the kitty that would come in to the house occasionally looking for scraps of food.

Isaiah 40:26

"Lift up your eyes and look to the heavens: Who created all these? He who brings out the starry host one by one and calls them forth each by name. Because of his great power and mighty strength, not one of them is missing"

John 10:3

"The gatekeeper opens the gate for him, and the sheep listen to his voice. He calls his own sheep by name and leads them out."

God knows our name even when we don't have one. God has his eyes on us and protects us even we are neglected and alone. I know that God had his hands of protection over Theo even before he came to our attention.

As Theo continued to heal we all fell in love with his hilarious faces. We all began to see his sneaky mischievous side. He was loud and vocal. He would play silly games.

Mitchell and Theo were instant buddies. They would joke around and play. Blessed and Theo also had a funny relationship that always made me smile.

Theo got big and fat and is now home with his grandmother.

Please pray that God continues to show babies to Robin that need love and attention and healing.

Acclimating

Thursday January 21, 2010

If I could write for days I still couldn't recount every thing that happened today. All that I saw, all the I learned and all that I heard.

God, my God, the one who put the stars in the heaven, the one who put the fish in the ocean, the one that has my tears in a jar, my God who calms my heart, who calms the fear of African children my God is BIG.

In America and in all "modern" places we think so much of ourselves it is hard to acknowledge others, especially God, a god that knows the intimate details of their heart, a god that knows their weaknesses and fears.

There is so much to say and the sun has already set, so I offer snapshots.

-As we were driving to take pictures of children who need surgery to try to get sponsors to pay for their $50, life changing surgery, a little kid stood out in the road blocking us, then giggled and ran off. It was simple and sweet.

-Also as we were driving on a beautiful road that overlooked Lake Victoria some cattle were crossing the road. I smiled because I was thinking back to my trips to Mexico. On one trip on the road to Nuevo Progresso cattle stopped and blocked the road. I took a picture and it is still one of my favorite photos.....

I have so much more to say but have not the time. In closing here is what I saw today.

-children

-red dirt

-shacks

-stores

-markets

-churches

-closed down orphanage

-victims of rape

-victims of abuse

-smiles

In a word I saw hope.

This is a portion of my journal from one year ago today. It was an exhausting day but so rewarding. We saw so many young people who needed medical help, such simple surgeries that would change their lives. At this point in time Mitchell and I were still acclimating to every thing that we were newly surrounded by.

If you want to help Acacia Tree here is a list of things that she needs:

This is a random list of things that would help me, my staff, the babies, my girls or some of the kids we help in the community. I'm sure I'll think of more in the next few days!!!

Thanks so much for asking what we need/want!!

blank CDs

2 Better Homes& Gardens Cookbooks (spiral bound)

roll of drawing paper

Kumon activity books (especially cutting, pasting, mazes, number games etc)

Craft kits for kids 4-7 (like ALEX)

Seeds (lettuce, cilantro, bok choy)

Baby toys for ages 6-18 months

Macaroni & cheese

girls shoes size 9.5 (for Deborah whose is unstable)

Bath&Body works (or similar) lotion/body spray

Men's size M t-shirts or Polo (for my guards)

rat tail combs with metal tail

Reese's PB cups (bite size)

Girls bikini panties Size 8

Girls ankle socks for size 2 shoes

Black Mary Janes size 2.5 (big girls)

Tostitos (we miss chips&salsa!!)

Herdez salsa

Green chile enchilada sauce (mild)

• • 

    Zemba Children's Foundation These items need to reach Robin's Mom and Dad's house by February 9 so they have time to get it all packed . They are leaving for Uganda on the 14th.
    Address is 275 FM 3285 , Fairfield, TX 75840
    Call them at 903-389-4617

    
    

Remembering Africa...

A year ago today I was in Uganda. I had been there for just two days and was still soaking in all that I was newly surrounded by. In fact, on the 19th I was in Kampala running errands like getting money changed and searching for a shampoo in a supermarket that seemed to only have conditioner.

I thought that by this time this year life would be very different. Mitchell and I planned on having a baby belly by now but because of health issues things haven't worked that way. I have been in the midst of tons of testing and soul searching. My hope and focus has been on my future family and the joy that will one day fill our home.

I have decided that during this time of waiting that I should reflect on the past year and everything that I learned and observed while in Uganda. I will be posting pieces of my journal from that time.

Monday January 18, 2010

We arrived in Africa last night. As I laid underneath the mosquito net I listened. I heard music playing. I heard dogs barking, one pathetic cat meowing and a myriad of bird/bug noises. I could hear cars going down the red dirt road and a baby crying from across the way.

It smells different here too. It smells sweeter. Maybe the smell is hope, a pleasing scent to encourage you to dream.

There are fresh red roses on the bedside. They are beautiful.

God prepare me for the work you want me to do.

Christmas means family!

I have been in Texas this last week. It has been wonderful. As we started getting closer and closer to Fort Worth along I-30 I started screaming and yelling at everything wonderful that I saw; at every minute memory of a park visit or a family mini-trip. And as we got closer to my dad's house I was just out of control. I was sure Mitchell was going to kick me out of the car for being so loud :) He told me to unroll the window and scream out the window but he soon changed his mine and told me that that just made me louder.

I love getting to see my family and everyone. I love every moment of the holidays and getting to see everyone.

I will post more later about how awesome Christmas is! Love you all!

What does death even mean?

How do you say goodbye? I don't mean like when you move far away or travel across the world. I am pretty good at saying that kind of goodbye. These last few days have been surrounded by thoughts of death. On Friday I was told that my step mother's father had some serious medical issues that was most likely cancer. On Saturday a dear friend asked us to pray for her uncle who is only 25 and has prostate cancer. That night she got the call that he had died. Today my father told me that the surgeon that Grampy's problem is inoperable. People who have similar issues general live for three weeks to three months more.

I just sat down and wrote a letter to my Grampy and Grammy and it was hard. How do you say goodbye? I don't really know how but God gave me some things to write. It was hard because I don't think I think the same thing about death as others.

I believe that God's timing and plans are perfect. I believe that death on earth means life in heaven. I believe that absence from the body is presence with God.

I believe Paul's writing in I Thessalonians 4:13-18

"But I would not have be ignorant, brothers, concerning them who are asleep, that you sorrow not, even as others have no hope. For if we believe that Jesus died and rose again, even so them also who sleep in Jesus will God bring with him. For this we say unto you by the word of the Lord, that we who are alive and remain unto the coming of the Lord shall not precede them who are asleep. For the Lord himself shall descend from heaven with a shout, with the voice of the archangel, and with the trump of God and the dead in Christ shall rise first. Then we who are alive and remain shall be caught up together with them in the clouds, to meet the Lord in the air and so shall we ever be with the Lord. Wherefore, comfort one another with these words."

I believe what Paul says in Philippians 1:21

"For me to live is Christ, and to die is gain"

I don't know if I would have the same convictions in the face of my own coming death but I believe that I would. The pain involved in dying is kind of scary but the moment that I am present with God will make all of life worth it.

I think of the Chris Tomlin song "How Can I Keep From Singing" the line, "I will sing with my last breath sing for I know that I will sing with angels and the saints around the throne"

But how do I say that same thing to someone on the cusps of death. How do say these things without sounding insincere or naive or strange?

My God is amazing. He makes the hard things easy and comforts us in the times that feel like they may crush us.

*Update: Last night, Monday the 1st, my grandfather walked through the pearly gates healed and whole around 10:30.